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Too Fat to Fish | 
| Authors: Artie Lange, Anthony Bozza
Publisher: Spiegel & Grau
Category: Book
List Price: $24.95
Buy New: $14.97
You Save: $9.98 (40%)
Rating:  169 reviews
Sales Rank: 78
Media: Hardcover
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 320
Shipping Weight (lbs): 1.3
Dimensions (in): 9.1 x 6.1 x 1.3
ISBN: 0385526563
Dewey Decimal Number: 792.7028092
EAN: 9780385526562
Publication Date: November 11, 2008
Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours
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Product Description
Outrageous, raw, and painfully funny true stories straight from the life of the actor, comedian, and much-loved cast member of The Howard Stern Show—with a foreword by Howard Stern.
When Artie Lange joined the permanent cast of The Howard Stern Show in 2001, it was possibly the greatest thing ever to happen in the Stern universe, second only to the show’s move to the wild, uncensored frontier of satellite radio. Lange provided what Stern had yet to find all in the same place: a wit quick enough to keep pace with his own, a pathetic self-image to dwarf his own, a personal history both heartbreaking and hilarious, and an ingrained sense of self-sabotage that continually keeps things interesting.
A natural storyteller with a bottomless pit of material, Lange grew up in a close-knit, working-class Italian family in Union, New Jersey, a maniacal Yankees fan who pursued the two things his father said he was cut out for—sports and comedy. Tragically, Artie Lange Sr. never saw the truth in that prediction: He became a quadriplegic in an accident when Artie was eighteen and died soon after. But as with every trial in his life, from his drug addiction to his obesity to his fights with his mother, Artie mines the humor, pathos, and humanity in these events and turns them into comedy classics.
True fans of the Stern Show will find Artie gold in these pages: hilarious tales that couldn’t have happened to anyone else. There are stories from his days driving a Jersey cab, working as a longshoreman in Port Newark, and navigating the dark circuit of stand-up comedy. There are outrageous episodes from the frenzied heights of his coked-up days at MADtv, surprisingly moving stories from his childhood, and an account of his recent U.S.O. tour that is equally stirring and irreverent. But also in this volume are stories Artie’s never told before, including some that he deemed too revealing for radio.
Wild, shocking, and drop-dead hilarious, TOO FAT TO FISH is Artie Lange giving everything he’s got to give. And like a true pro, the man never disappoints.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 164 more reviews...
 Do Yourself a Favor: Read this Book November 12, 2008
68 out of 81 found this review helpful
There is just no way to not love this book. Whether you are a fan of Artie Lange or not, the book is fresh and insightful, and it almost goes without saying, funny as hell. Not for the faint of heart (but seriously is anything connected with Howard Stern for the faint of heart?), the narrative is laced with expletives, the situations are sometimes raunchy or downright gross, and the author is not trying to paint a pretty picture of his addiction-riddled life. Once you get past the reality backwash, it is a book filled with honesty and humor as well as some surprising insights.
Artie Lange fully admits to having lived his life thus far as a first-class f***-up, allowing himself to be caught up in every imaginable vice and addiction. But he firmly believes, along with his boss, that his vices feed his amazing comedic genius. His ability to survive his own behavior in itself seems an act of genius. Personally, I think that Artie is one of that rare breed of comedian who can make people laugh hysterically with the most offhand unscripted comment. The life of decadence may make for some inherently funny situations, but I think this guy could make the telephone book funny. Ease up on yourself Artie, the world needs funny guys like you.
While I expected a book filled with humorous stories, what I didn't expect was the down-to-earth telling of them. The narrative is sometimes simplistic, but it really makes you feel like Artie is in the room with you telling you these stories. While I laughed myself sick at times, I also had tears in my eyes over the author's description of his relationship with his father, and his family's life after his father's tragic accident.
All in all the book will leave you feeling that there is a great deal more to Artie Lange than raunchy humor. He came across to me as a genuinely nice human being who cares deeply about the people who make up his universe. His occasional deeper insights (such as his description of the happiest moment of his childhood) reveal him as a complex man, whose flaws only make him that much more interesting. I loved this book, and I like Artie Lange more than ever. I wish him a long life with many fishing trips.
Part-racist, part-homophobe, part-sexist....all GENIUS!! November 11, 2008
22 out of 35 found this review helpful
He's Artie Lange a.k.a. The current occupant of the coveted "Jackie Chair" on the Howard Stern Show... but in case you don't know, he is a brilliant stand-up comedian who got his big TV break on MADTV, assuming the obligatory "funny fat guy" stereotype (a sketch show staple created by the late, great John Belushi on SNL). Unlike his hero, Lange is one of the world's greatest storytellers ... his cautionary tales of self-deprecating woe are filled with hookers, hedonism and substance abuse.
Artie's honest stories are touching at times and the stuff of legend at others. His memoirs are a trainwreck of decadence and a glorious modern day comedy of errors to liken Falstaff or a New Jersey I-tie "Confederacy of Dunces." Long time listeners of Lange on the radio or those familiar with his stand-up will gladly recognize some stories - the Pig Suit story, from his MADDTV days, for example. Other stories are new as yet unrevealed anecdotes from the comedian. One striking one is Artie's suicide attempt and recovery.
This volume is less showbiz oriented than many of Lange's tales. Touching tales of his early life and his dad, along with some scary stories of Arties sorted past....Even with one bad call after the next, by the end and Artie's own admission, he has plenty more stories to tell. Thanks to AMAZON.COM's preorders (over 12,000) his publisher has offered him another book, which he has accepted.
Also check out audio version, the CD is nar. by Gary, Jimmy F. and Artie himself.
 Waste of time November 15, 2008
20 out of 63 found this review helpful
This book basicly rides on the popularity of the Howard Stern Show. I forever will have the shame of saying "I bought this book". The book itself offers little to nothing but mindless banter. Sadly, it's a miss use paper.
 Humorous and touching, but 95% all-told on the Stern show November 14, 2008
19 out of 29 found this review helpful
Artie is my favorite member of the Stern show, but every story here is a repeat, except for 1 important detail in one chapter (I won't spoil it).
If you're an avid Stern/Lange fan, you probably already own this book and have found the retreading. If you're a casual fan you won't learn much new.
I have both the hardcover and the audio book, I'm very impressed by Artie & Gary's readings. Florentine's is pretty good, Levy's is not even bad funny, it's just bad.
Too Weak For Life... Wahhh November 17, 2008
19 out of 28 found this review helpful
Wahhh, I can't deal with success. I listen to Stern about 3-4 hours a day and about 60% of the time I love Artie's jabs and one liners. But when it comes to his story telling, I believe JD is more articulate. I bought this book because I am a Stern fan and wanted to know about Artie. As previously stated in other reviews, most of these stories have been told on the show. After listening to the show and reading this book, one thing is clear, Artie loves to pity himself and is always looking for some sort of sympathy from others. If you listen to the show, you do not need to purchase this book. If you want a few hundred pages of wahhhh.. then buy it.
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